The lab It is on Crack
by LIFE as a SHIRT
Summary: When the lab starts freaking Sara out, only Grissom and his psychopathic habits can give her answers. Challenge from BIGGERimagination


Bigger Imagination's WTF Challenge

A/N: Okay. This was a challenge given to me by my BEST FRIEND.  
I don't really remember what the criteria was.  
Something about grissom.

* * *

Sara's POV

I walked into the lab on a typical Monday morning, expecting my usual folder from Cath, describing some poor hooker who got raped, or beheaded or something like that. I walked in thinking this, but as soon as I saw Gil Grissom, sane bug magnet that he is (usually), skipping down the hallway of the lab in a tutu, my views on this day had changed quite a bit. I nearly dropped my coffee cup, but saved it with my left hand as Grissom skipped by, strangely a basket of flowers clutched in his arm, throwing petals along the hallway.

"Helloooo, Sara! Is it not a beautiful day? We shouldn't be stuck here in this epitome of morbidity! We should be out! Planting flowers! Saving whales! Carpe diem, Sara! Have a flower! Have fifty flowers! Be happy!"

As Grissom skipped off, Las Vegas thighs wobbling all over the place, I turned my attention to the fact that I was about to be run down by Nick Stokes, who obviously had it in his mind that he was invincible, and ten years younger than he really was. Maneuvering the skateboard he was riding ever so clumsily, Nick yelled at me, but I couldn't jump out of the way, unless I wanted to jump right into Archie, innocently clutching a donut and a cup of coffee. "Shit, Nick!"

Only after I had landed on the floor, pretty much killing my shoulders, did I realize that Nick Stokes was laying on top of me, in a very suggestive position.

"Get ready for the extreme, baby!" Nick said, pushing himself off me, and jumping back on his skateboard, careening past Catherine, and forcing Warrick to jump backwards into the women's restroom.

"What is _with_ everybody today?" asked Cath, turning her head over her shoulder toward Nick in disbelief. "Did I see Grissom in a tutu earlier?"

"Yeah. I think so. Maybe he took too many—," I looked at Catherine in shock. "What the hell are you _wearing?!_" She had on red vinyl shoes, that were at least ten times to big for her. I am not EVEN exaggerating. She also had on puffy polka dotted pants, followed by a vertically striped pastel shirt, also ten times too big.

"Oh, for Lindsey's birthday, I hate hiring clowns, so I got a dunk tank. She and her friends have outgrown clowns a little, so I figured, they might like drowning me in freezing cold water while I'm wearing a clown outfit. You like it? I got the shoes free once I bought the shirt and pants."

I could NOT believe what had gotten into the lab today.

Little did I know, my day was about to get a whole lot weirder.

Nick's POV

I slid in the lab, causing quite a commotion. I had borrowed Lindsey's friend's skateboard for the day. After Grissom had informed us of the special circumstances, I needed something crazy to do. I figured my days of pretending I was Evil Knievel when I was little were paying off.

"Shit, Nick!" yelled Sarah, as I almost ran over her. We both toppled over, and I fell on top of her. Feeling I should do my part for this occasion, I remembered something I had once heard on a prank phone call.

"Get ready for the extreme, baby!" and I was off, almost smashing into Cat, dressed like a clown, and pushing Warrick back into the girls bathroom. I slid into Grissom's office, and grabbed a Go-Girl off his desk.

"Nicky, If you keep drinking those, your testicles will fall off and you'll develop breasts." I spat out the sweet pink liquid.

"So did you get her?"

"Yeah. I think I scared her quite a bit." Grissom held a glass jar containing some sort of hairy arachnid in it, crawling around.

"You aren't gonna throw that on her, are you?" Grissom glared at me, and I held my hands up in protest. "Hey, it wouldn't surprise me, I just wouldn't want to be Sara. Oh, crap. Here she comes." I dashed over towards the door and grabbed a skip-it. I yanked open the door, and bent down. I threw the skip-it around Sara's ankles. She stumbled, and fell, flat on her face. "WHAT THE HELL!" she said, pushing herself off the ground.

"Yess!" I said closing the door as silently as I could so she wouldn't hear me.

Greggo's POV

'Smells Like Teen Spirit' blasted through the speakers of my computer. I played air guitar for a while, but then got to the task on hand. I had analyzed the DNA Warrick had left me earlier and then ran a few strands of DNA through the database. I turned to the mirror Catherine had left me, and started analyzing my hair. I scrunched it up, and then added more gel, making the spikes as perfect as I possibly could. I grabbed the Listerine pocket sized spray bottle and gave my mouth a few quick squirts and stashed my porn in a secret secret place.

And then she walked in.

The reason I got out of bed every morning at outrageously early hours.

She walked in, and she was gorgeous.

"What the hell is with the lab this morn—did you do something to your hair? Why does it smell so much like axe in here?"

I coughed a little, and tried to move in front of the bottle of axe innocently laying tipped over on my desk. "I know! What is with everyone today?"

"What do you want Greg?"

"Wanna get dinner?" Fuck. I'm so stupid. Aren't you supposed to ease into the question? That's what all those websites say.

And then she laughed.

She laughed at me.

Talk about pouring salt on the wound. I guess my expression told her how I was feeling, because she immediately changed.

"I'm sorry, Greggo. I can't. Rain check. So what's with the lab today?" She had foiled the plot.

It had been Nick's idea. They were all to freak Sara out as much as they could in the morning, then, when she came in to get her DNA from me, I was _supposed_ to ask her VERY casually to dinner, in hopes that she would think I'm the only sane person in the lab, as completely opposite of usual.

You can see how that worked out.

"Greg?"

"We were freaking out. So you'd say yes. Coffee?" I held up my second cup I'd gotten for her.

"What?" Sara was looking a little like she was in shock.

Sara's POV

The lab, I had assumed, was on crack.

Grissom's POV

Sitting at my typewriter late in the night, I wrote down the tales of what had happened in the lab. Laughing maniacally at what I had pushed the lab to do. They had fallen for my plot. I laughed again.

The door bell rang.

That can't be right. I don't have friends that would be bothering me so late on a Monday evening. I stepped up from my chair and opened the door, only to be met in the face by a large amount of silly string going up my nostrils, followed by several strings of girlish laughter. I looked up, expecting to see Catherine and Sara, but was shocked instead, when I saw Nick and Greg. They skipped merrily off down the driveway, leaving without a word.

Sara's POV

Correction. My LIFE is on crack.

No one in particular's POV

As Grissom sat at his typewriter late at night, maniacally laughing, little did he know that he was controlling the actions of his coworkers. I know, how 'Stranger than Fiction'. But he would simply type the words "Sara Sidle skipped down the hallway" and Sara Sidle would skip down the hallway.

This brings me to the end of my hopelessly endless story.

Whatever.


End file.
